If you’re a badass but you still hide in the bathroom to eat Kit-Kats and play Animal Crossing Pocket Camp in peace, then we should probably be besties. At the very least, you can say hi and bask in the warmth of knowing you’re not alone. Criticisms are fine too, just know that I’ll probably use a bottle of wine to recover after reading it so you should feel bad about costing my kids their weekly Little Caesar’s pizza on activities night.